This always happens to me. I hit a wall. I lose my inspiration. So, it has happened and I have not an excuse in the world. Here I am on day 14 when I should be on day 17. I'll be honest. I lost my focus. I made it about me and how I feel instead of the Lord and how great He is despite how I feel. It is good I am doing this because my default setting is to pity myself. Why doesn't he/she like me? Why wasn't I invited? What did I ever do to make him/her unfriend me? When you are dwelling on yourself, there is NO way you can dwell in the Lord. There is no way you can dwell on the Lord's goodness when all that consumes your mind is the worthlessness of yourself. My dad has a saying, "Facebook is of the devil." I think he takes that stance too far, but you know...he has a point. I compare myself to everyone else. Their weight, their tan, their clean house, their thousands of friendships, their weddings, their vacations...everything. I can't compare to all that. Then I see parties, weddings, get togethers, lunch outings, baby showers, wedding showers...that I haven't been invited to. My world falls apart in an instant. I recognize I need help. I am resting on Psalm 121. The Word is better than any worldly therapy.
Psalm 121
where does my help come from?
2 My help comes from the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth.
he who watches over you will not slumber;
4 indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.
the Lord is your shade at your right hand;
6 the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.
he will watch over your life;
8 the Lord will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.
My 28 thanks:
1. The Lord is patient with me.
2. The Lord has plans for my life and they are good.
3. The Lord will watch over me in all my ways.
4. No matter who turns away, the Lord is always there.
5. The Lord does not slumber, so He is never caught off guard.
6. In my weakness, the Lord is strong.
7. The Lord has blessed me with meaningful friendships.
8. I saw my friend Amber in the Target parking lot today. I have missed her and it was good to see her smiling face.
9. I saw my friend Valarie at Target today. We had a nice long conversation and I might have even made her late for her kids' swimming lessons.
10. Valarie always encourages me. Every conversation we have, I walk away believing I can do whatever I set my mind to.
11. Matt's allergy nose spray was way expensive, but he felt so much better after taking it, so it was totally worth it.
12. We spend longer than I anticipated at the library.
13. My kids love the library!
14. I found the last book of the series I have read this past week at the library!
15. They didn't have Beth Moore's So Long Insecurity, it was checked out. Now I have something to look for next time I am there.
16. I found a DVD of The Muppet Show at the library! I am excited to watch it.
17. How cool is it that the library has movies that you can "rent" for free!?
18. Matt is so great to me. He listens to my pity parties with concern and then lets me cry. He also helps me move on. I need him in my life.
19. I drank a lot of water today.
20. Water is not always my first choice, but I always feel better when I drink it instead of anything else.
21. Matt got tickets to tonight's RedHawk's game through his job. (FREE!!)
22. The game was a lot of fun!
23. The kids had a great time at the game too!
24. I got to meet Quincy, Matt's new coworker. I hear a lot of stories, so I am glad I have a face now to go with the stories.
25. The little boy in front of us got a foul ball. The excitement on his face was adorable! (Madelyn was upset that she didn't get it, but it would have just ended up on her floor and this kid was ecstatic! I'm glad he got it!)
26. The weather for the game was really nice. Not too hot and just the right amount of breeze.
27. The RedHawk's lost the first game, but they won the second game!
28. I got to talk to my friend Angela on the phone today. Talking (in my opinion) is better than texting or messaging on facebook. It is more personal. I love talking to friends on the phone.
Bonus: I've been really struggling with this blog. I have had a block at about number 11 every. single. day. Not today. Today, I could have come up with several more.
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